Trying...very hard!

"When you are happy, you can forgive a great deal." -Princess Diana

I don't even know where to start. I guess the beginning is appropriate.

We'll S and I have decided to try at being friends. I really thought I couldn't do it, but it's turing out to be ok...I guess. I still don't feel good. We were recently together and it was like we were never broken. I still look at her and feel so incredibly in love! How will I ever get over this? When I look at her and when she looks at me, everything is still there, weird enough it seems stronger. I feel with all my heart, and the place in the bottom of my stomach that everything was real and our love was true. I just wish she wasn't just so scared of being judged, we would still be moving forward today. Everything happening and getting "real" is what I believe scared her.

Sad thing is I would willing go back if she called and wanted to try again. I know, I'm a lunatic right? I have just never been this in love. S has to break my heart for me to ever fully give up on us I guess. Deep down I just know it was real.

All in all, I've been pretty excited about life recently. I know that maybe I won't end up with the person I actually want to live my life with, but I might end up just as happy with someone who loves me just as much as I love them. Granted, I'm NOT gonna wait around for her to be ok with us forever and when that time comes, I can't wait to be in love again!!

In no way shape or form am I a serial dater. I'm not one of those people that just needs to be in love. People like that make me itch. I like to fall in when it comes to love.

I'm am just ranting on and on, I'm sorry. I just wish I knew what to do with all of these thoughts in my head. I love you readers known and unknown for reading. Special shout out to Kevin over at Jeff and Kevin DC. It's couples and people like you, that help me see everyday that I CAN have the life I want. Thank you so much for loving and living your lives! xoxoxo

-Kira


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone